There, I said it. I've never before had the guts to say that I'm a fat man. I've always used excuses to console myself: "I've just put on a few pounds," "Life is very stressful right now," "I'm having a baby" (oh wait that's not true), "I'm big boned." If you've heard it, then I've said it.
Today, I finally admit it: I am fat.
It's true, not all Americans are fat, but we are the fattest nation in the world. Now I'm a statistic and it doesn't feel good. I don't like that I can't walk somewhere without breaking out into a sweat. I don't like that when I lay down flat on my back, I can rest something (a book, computer, a cup of soup) on my stomach and it will be at eye level. It's not okay. Here is the sad reality, it's not okay to be fat. Whenever someone else sees a fat person they look at them and scoff. They immediately think to themselves, "hey fatty, lay off the food," or something equally offensive.
I would say people underestimate how hard it is to be fat, but then I check myself and realize that at times it is easier to be fat than to try to get skinny. I don't make an overwhelming effort to exercise (even though I have in the past), I don't make a tremendous effort to eat right (even though I have in the past), and I sure don't apply for elective surgery to correct my mistakes (even though I have NOT in the past).
But I'm tired of fat. I'm tired of the looks. I'm tired of the clothes that don't fit right. I'm tired of chaffing in weird places. I'm tired of looking at the mirror and being embarrassed for myself. I'm tired of breathing heavy and carrying around a giant belly. I'm tired of keeping myself locked away like some kind of recluse because I'm embarrassed to be around other people. I'm tired of being fat.
So, I'm going to do what all fat people do at least once a day. I'm going to commit to not being fat. The reason it's okay to make fun of fat people is because all people who are not fat think it's some kind of choice not to be fat. In some ways it is. However, they think of the choice as being like a light switch. To turn on or off a light switch requires no real effort. To go from being fat to being skinny, however, is like going to medical school. It requires diligent hours of study, commitment, and hard work.
It is here where I will document my trials in an attempt to go from this:
to this:
So, please join me in the my trials, tribulations, and explorations as I move forward.
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