Day 18 (of 110): Explanation Station

I know I dropped a potential bomb yesterday evening and then just left to go to bed. As is typical with my cycles of dieting, I start out very exciting and make some limited progress and then my body kicks back in and I end up giving up. This usually happen when "life gets in the way," in effect, when I have other things to do and cannot devote 110% of my attention to blogging and dieting. 

And yet, I am not less motivated. In fact, I have such a strong motivation that I'm getting ready to jump back into it! 

But let me explain. Last night I said I of it have binge eating disorder. I also admitted I have no idea what that is. But if the name is any indication, I have it.

I know that the way i best like to ingest bad food is to binge it. Now I'm not taking about bulimia where I binge and then immediately purge. No, I have the much worse disorder: I just eat quickly and shamefully (often in secret) and live with the consequences. 

When I was little, my parents used to hide candy around the house because I would eat it all so quickly. But I would find it and secrete let binge it all! 

So today I set about figuring out what binge-eating disorder is all about. I Googled it and found bingeeatingdisorder.com. 

According to the website one of the symptoms of the disorder is eating beyond when you are full. I can't stress enough how often I've done this. And that is incredibly disconcerting.

But I feel like admitting I have binge-eating disorder, is giving up. It's not a disorder, I'm okay to give it a go and try to beat it. Maybe just knowing that I tend towards binge-eating will help me overcome it. Or maybe I need therapy. Either way, let's beat this thing. 

92 days to go. And today is the day I put myself back into public. It's been the better part of three weeks and I'm only 9 pounds down. I've got quite a way to go and I'll do that trough recommitment to my goals. 

- The Fat Man